¶ … Partner traits influence the process of maintaining Romantic Relationships
Choosing and retaining a romantic partner is a challenging task that most people encounter in their lives. The desire to understand and accept others' trait in the context of enduring relationship is a topic mirrored in the growing body of psychology. When people are seeking romantic relationships, they desire a wide range of traits, some observable, others difficult to discern. It is challenging to choose a partner by merely observing his/her physical traits without learning the inner being of the person. Therefore, when making decisions on the right partners, there are numerous factors to consider. Some people will consider how other people assess their partner, while others will evaluate the person based on other aspects far from physical and emotional factors. To avoid making incompatible choices, this paper provides a self-help guide which gives the five best tips for choosing and evaluating a relationship partner (Eastwick, Finkel & Eagly, 2011).
Idea standards model
The ideal standard model plays a fundamental role in making a decision on the right partner. The model performs three functions; Analyzing, explaining and regulating. In determining whether the relationship is good or bad, people will evaluate their current romantic relationship with their pre-existing standards and ideals about what denotes a good or bad relationship. If their ideals match with their partner's traits, they will become fulfilled and satisfied by their relationships and expectations of living with their partner will also increase. However, when either or bothpartners discover discrepancies in belief and value systems the potential for conflict and tension is increased and the potential for separation is thereby dramatically increased. One of the fundamental elements for a successful relationship is love. Relationships founded on true love are likely to thrive compared to ones established on other concepts such as companionship (Sharma (n.d).
Consequently, the flexibility of ideal standards influences the three functions in the romantic relationship. In addition, ideal standards in romantic relationships entail three correlating elements, the self, the partner, and the relationship. People tend to charge an ideal partner based on five basic perspectives: commitment, sincerity, trust/loyalty, responsibility and self-esteem (Travers, N. (n.d). However, a relationship characterized by discrepancies will always focus on maintaining short-term relationships rather than long-term relationships.
Self-Help Guide - Tips to evaluation a Romantic Partner
1. Commitment to Personal Development
a) The person shows interest in learning ways of becoming a better person and partner.
b) The partner accepts emotional burden and weaknesses.
c) The partner shares personal objectives to counterbalance the weaknesses
2. Emotional frankness
a) The partner is aware of his/her emotions
b) The partner is comfortable expressing his/her emotions
c) The partner shows a desire to share the feelings with his/her partner
3. Trust/loyalty
a) Partners are sincere with themselves
b) They show sincerity with other people and their partners
c) They are honest about wants and emotions
4. Responsibility
a) Ableto take care of oneself
b) Respects the values, feelings of their partners
c) They keep their promises
5. Self-Esteem
a) They value themselves without showing arrogance
b) Capable of taking care of their physical well-being, properties and environment
c) They never allow other people take advantage of their emotional states
PART B: Justification for the self-help guide
Ideal romantic relationship is an exceptional relationship. It involves mutual responses from two persons with a desire spending their lives with each other. It entails emotional, intrinsic, and sexual union of two partners who show loyalty to each other in sharing their intimate values, trust, and desires. In the existence of such a union, the partners can disclose to each other the innermost and close aspects of themselves. However, the relationship may breakdown because some traits may differ with the ideal standards required by the other partner (Figueredo, Sefcek & Jones, 2006).
In such cases, the partners may prefer breaking up the relationship, which may cause...
In order to avoid relationship discrepancies, partners should evaluate ideal traits from their partners and evaluate whether they match their ideal standards. The purpose of the self-help guide is to give desirable tips when evaluating a romantic partner. In recent research conducted regarding the likelihood of a lasting relationship, Zentner (2005) found out that, more than 50% of marriages in United States end up in either separation or divorce.
Most people claim that they choose the wrong partners based on various circumstances, such as, physical attraction, financial support, previous relationship and so forth. In solving their romantic relationships, they seek help from various sources, such as self-help resources in pop culture. Even though these self-help resources provide a potential mirror for people suffering from relationship issues, they may seem irrelevant to people with little education. Self-help materials function as psychological interventions in their own capacities, and sometimes misguide people with little education based on the context used in presenting them (Tran, Simpson & Fletcher, 2008).
People differ in the extent to which they desire a certain person to be there romantic partner. There are multiple facets in understanding what triggers a person's desire to choose a partner, yet the same qualities fail to inspire another person's desire. Perhaps, people differ in their choice of partners based on which traits are important to them in an ideal romantic relationship. Research shows that partners are less likely to end their relationship if the traits matched with the ideals. In an effort to reconcile relationship discrepancies and build long-term relationships, the following literature seeks to clarify the role that an ideal partner plays in deciding whom to select and keep as romantic partners Tran, Simpson & Fletcher, 2008).
Specifically, the essence of this study is testing to what extentconsistencies in an ideal partner and the traits in the prospective romantic partner are able to predict the relationship outcome across various and diverse contexts. The research conducted on this topic found two possible reasons that might expose differences that accountfor a perceived ideal trait match. The first method of getting to knowing and learning about a romantic partner is by viewing their written profile against having a face-to-face conversation with them. The second reason refers to the stages of a relationship involvement; desiring against being in a relationship with a romantic partner. The match between ideal standards and perceived traits in a romantic partner may predict the outcome of the relationship when:
a) A partner uses a written profile to analyze his/her partner.
b) Analyzing their current relationship and not focus on a partner with whom they simply desire a relationship.
Interdependence theory affirms that partners compare the benefits they obtain from a certain relationship against the benefits they deserve or anticipate. A wide range of dispositional and situational aspects generates these anticipations. For instance, the traits that people think of when they perceive their ideal romantic partner. Nevertheless, a romantic partners' positive and negative traits, such as: sincerity and demanding respective may cause interpersonal tension, and therefore, people analyze their romantic partners in a different way based on the traits they envision in their partners (Zentner, 2005).
Essentially, when people envision romantic partners in the abstract, they vary in their convictions about how a partner's traits will influence their own life outcomes, and these convictions influence the level to which traits describe people's ideal romantic partners. As indicated in (Part 1), the three partner ideals described by ideal standards model are essential in choosing the right romantic partners. The three partner ideals include; evaluation, explanation and regulation. In evaluation, the partner must evaluate the other partner's traits to ascertain they match with ideal standards he/she desires. In explanation, partners must explain to their partners the traits they expect from them in order to give them ample time to match their traits with the ideal standards required. Finally, in regulating, partners must accept their traits whether positive or negative and show commitment in strengthening their traits (Figueredo, Sefcek & Jones, 2006).
However, various discrepancies and flexibilities may affect the extent of relationship. For instance, some…
